Meeeeeeeeeee's Blog

mincepies and mayhem

November 25, 2008

Today I was very domesticated,baked mincepies and other christmas goodies,sorted out the decorations checked for breakages that batteries and bulbs ok.

Have sorted out clothes and toys that have been outgrown ready to drop off at the charity shop,in the economic climate I am unable to give as much to charity as id like so this is my way of doing my bit,so off they will go to help the aged.

I’m trying to have a christmas that embrases the true spiritual reason for the festivities,without all the commercial hoopla,we are making table decorations and tree decorations,with foliage and pine cones that we found on the floor of the chase (not a forest as wasn’t owned by the king so called chase or so my daughter tells me) either way acres upon acres of trees and deer 20mins walk or 3minutes by car,from my house and is exceptionally pretty this time of year.


Today I will be mostly..

November 21, 2008

Yesterday was a really good day full of synergies and have a really positive outlook today.

tonight I will be going to church for an informal get together bit food and fellowship,i haven’t been for a while the nativity is soon and Isaac may have a small part ofa sheep,which will be so cute and I’m guessing amusing as when he goes to church he points to pictures of jesus and says”jeeeyus areoplane” and points to the ceiling he knows areoplanes and birds in the sky and his limited knowledge of spiritual things he knows jesus lives in heaven or in the sky,and he thinks that aeroplanes are going to visit jesus,bless him.?They think he is amusing at church and try to stiffle laughs,when people or bishop put hands together and pray and bow heads,Isaac stands up puts hands together and starts shouting “Johnny johnny johnny” kicks foot and goes yay,pretending to be johnny wilkinson rugby player.

He went towards front of church and sat by bishop,thats was fine no problem then he stood up pointed his finger at congregation and say “norty”.

little flashes of his personality and who he will be are showing already so is going to be a fun journey with him.

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little blessings

November 19, 2008

    my little blessings,all my children are special and greatly enhance my life and the latest edition is no exception..

but recentley he has caused me many sleepless nights which is part of being a parent but I wouldn’t trade him for the world,Isaac thomas has been poorly since birth and had a horrendous bout of chicken pox at four months old,leaving his immune system weak and vunerable which meant he had to have seperate immunisations spaced out and since he has had virus upon virus.All of which I could deal with quite as could help him by calpol antibiotics,even had very strong steroids which gave him thrush,so more medicine.

His latest illness has left me bereft and feeling inadequate,he at eighteen months old started having what looked like fainting turns,I took him to the doctors and explained and said obviously a baby shouldn’t be fainting and refered him to paediatricians,whilst he was waiting the appointment he had two what look like strokes after ringing emergency dr to send paramedics,they sent him to a local hopspital to see on call dr,who took one look at him said no way child can wait a week to see paeds and rang another hospital and said he was concerned as baby lethargic no muscle tone and really pale,we were transfered to another hospital the doctors kept him over night and the specialist order  bloods ct scans eegs and mri as soon as possible,not mri facilities at hospital so would need emergency appt at another one,whilst being arranged isaac had eeg and was told we could go home once got results as he had picked up and was walking all beit wobbly as left side weak,after eeg i sat around waiting to be told by nurse they’ve got results and the drs are discussing what to do,my reaction was that doesn’t sound good.

after what seemed an eternity of waiting the nurse came and said his results were abnormal and he couldn’t go home,and part brain activity that abnormal was focal in one part of his brain suggesting something causing seizures ie brain tuma,blood clot or dysprasia (a birth mark on brain) after one attempt at mri and mild sedation he woke up scared by noisey machine then tried for ct and again sedate him but he woke up scared and couldnt do as need to lie perfectly still,so outcome bham childrens hospital under general anesthetic which held risks but needed to be done.birmingham childrens hospital is one best in country similar to great ormond street so knew he would have best chances there.

The experience of going down with a baby and having to hold him on your lap whilst nurses and anesthesia specialist put him to sleep is an experience no parent should have to go through,I had to put hand on his little head and hold mask on his face to breathe it in,he was scared and crying so was I,even though the nurses saying if he cries he will take bigger breathes and go to sleep easier,didn’t put my mind at ease was thinking what if he is allergic to anesthesia im hurting my baby,as he fell asleep and I kissed him and was taken to the ward to wait 45 mins which seemed like a year I was as scared as anyone could be and praying he would wake up.

The wait was over he awoke then went back to sleep,as he went to ward for recovery and after a short sleep i gently prodded him to check he was ok,that wait was over just the wait for results after again what seemed like an eternity no brain tuma.phew I could breathe a sigh of relief but seizures more frequent,he is on sodium valporate having atonic seizures where loses muscle tone and collapses and mylonic muscle jerk seizures and recently having another type but i cant recall what called,he had four seizures other day and his health is deteriorating as has very little appetite and seizures becoming more frequent and lasting longer.

he is also showing slight autistic tendencies but that could be because of effect seizures having on him am awaiting to see what paeds say.

This is the part of parenting I dont like the worry and the fact I cant help him just give him 24/7 care.

on a lighter note Robin is doing amazing in mainstream school full time and is getting more handsome by the day,carrie-ann has passed all 12 gcses high passes a* a,s and bs and is doing well at college and is doing forensic science,she is looking forward to watching an ortopsy before she does one.(yuk blood bleugh) i still keep in touch via text and phonecalls with some ex 20 sixers..sunshine,cheeky to mention a few but as pc broke and recently got new one lost email addresses of majority of friends.

well how is everyone?

November 19, 2008

Im back after a while not blogging,so an update to those who remember me,all beit by a new name but same old person.

had my latest arrival,who is not so little 22 months and a little gem even though my monthly trips to hospital with him and fornightly drs visits as is poorly bless him are starting to take its toll on me emotionaly.

I’ve been doing partime college and passed 3 exams nothing exciting,and run a support group for microcephaly which my elder son has and my daughter has started college and is doing well.

I’m the same as usual keeping plodding on and keeping positive as my mates formerly from 20six will know.

well today i’ve been having a long chat with a mate and made me realise I’m a good person I should ask for help more so I will work on that one and try to be more kinder to myself.

little steps but I’m not gonna change I am just me,always true to myself not pretending to be something I’m not.

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